“Loco del calor!” as David Lee Roth once sang (and as we in the South are experiencing). Plus, I refuse to use the word “frenzy” today. Here comes a blog-along, like NHL Draft Day. So bear with me as things get crazy!

*  Wow!   Dan Hinote an assistant coach with the Columbus Blue Jackets.  Guess he’s retired.  Unless he’s going the player-coach “Slap Shot” route!

*  More once it hits noon!

* Michael Leighton re-signed in Philly. (Two-year deal.)

* Paille re-signs Boston. Savvy can address later!

* It’s noon.  Let the game begin!

*  Sergei Gonchar moves to Ottawa!

* Former Thrasher Braydon Coburn stays with Philly (two year deal, per Craig Custance). Thank you D-Wad for losing him for Alexei Zhitnik! Grrrr…

* COME ON THRASHERS!!!!!

* People who do on-air fonts need to remember the difference between a person who “resigns” and a person who “re-signs.” HUGE difference, loves. /copyeditor rant

* Alex Tanguay (back) to Calgary Flames. Wow.

* Philly VERY busy! They got Andrei Meszaros from Tampa.

* BABCHUCK’S BACK. The ‘Canes pick up their on-again, off-again, sometimes troublesome Slavic baby.

* Wheee! Guillaume Latandresse re-signs with Minnesota Wild. Get WILD!!

* Marty Biron leaves Philly for New York Rangers — will he be the next Kevin Weekes — never able to secure that No. 1 goalie situation. I think he already is the new Kevin Weekes.

* Come on Thrashers — if you can’t get the Moose, get DAN ELLIS! YEAH! Come on!

* Former prime minister Paul Martin to Pittsburgh!? What’s going down with NJ?!

* Does letting Paul Martin go mean a Kovalchuk signing is nigh?!?

* Dying to see where Kovy goes — is he a greedy bastard? Or does he just dislike Atlanta’s direction? Does he go to LA to revive his wife’s singing career?!

* Little Philippe Paradis traded! Awww Mr. Glasses from last year’s draft to Blackhawks. Versteeg going back to Leafs.

* Zybenk Michalek to Pittsburgh. (Five years, 20 mil.)

* COME ON THRASHERS GET SOMEONE GOOD!!!

* Colby Armstrong to Toronto — three years, $9 million. That’s a lot, I think.

* Dan Ellis goes to Atlanta rival Tampa Bay. On the plus side, no more Niitty in Tampa (for those who don’t know, Atlanta has never beaten Niittymaki). On the minus, oh Dan Ellis would have been a fabulous bit of marketing for the Thrashers.

* Olie Jokinen back to the Flames — really? Is that possible? Hard to believe that rumor.

* Jody Shelley to Flyers. Gosh. Excitement today. The Flyers are going wacky today?! No?

* Tough guy-o-rama: Derek Boogaard to New York. Yowza!

* I guess it’s OK to mention here that deep in my heart I still wish for Kovy back in Atlanta.

* Where will Slava Kozlov end up? I am afraid it might be the KHL.

* Surprisingly unsurprising or unsurprisingly surprising. Colby leaving ATL. No surprise. Everyone, myself included, figured he’d go rejoin the Penguins and his bromance-worthy pal Crosby. I wish him all the best in Toronto. He’ll be entertaining to the media if nothing else, because of, you know, who he is. ;-)

* Not all that surprising that Kovy is still unsigned. I am sure he has a million and one options to go through. But, wondering, if at some point he doesn’t start getting into a pickle in which teams keep spending and have less room for him. Therefore, he ends up with fewer choices?

* Chris Viv (@ajcthrashers on Twitter) reports that the Thrashers are “working” on their goaltender situation. Oooooh. I wonder if that just means re-signing The Moose. Or bringing back Michael Garnett?!?! (Whose hockey cards I still collect incidentally, and who has really done well in the KHL.)

* I like the Tampa Bay Lightning re-signing Martin St. Louis. He’s solid. He’s a Thrasher killer, but he just works there. Way to go Tampa on Marty and getting Dan Ellis, whom I coveted for the Thrashers.

* Where will Goddess Sasha fave Paul Kariya go?!?

* So Dan Hamhuis (great last name) to the Canucks. Interesting. I never thought Dan Hamhuis would be an edge-of-your-seat, where-will-he-go?!? kind of guy. No offense to him, but it’s wacky.

* So Thrashers free agents: Maxim Afinogenov, Pavel Kubina, Eric Boulton, Evgeny Artyukin, (my dear and beloved) Vyacheslav Kozlov, Chrisoph Schubert, Chris Chelios (LOL), Marc Popovic and Johan Hedberg. NONE of these guys is signed. Yowza! Maybe Goddess Thorkhild has some scoop from Russia about Afinogenov, Kozlov or Artyukin (??).

* D-Men in hot demand today.

* Some of these deals just don’t thrill: Jeff Tambellini to Vancouver. Maybe if it was my team. Hmph.

* Chris Mason signs with Thrash — wow. I am going to need a few seconds/minutes/days to think about this, particularly the loss of fan-fave Hedberg, which this certainly means.

* Yowza — Chicago South for the Thrashers with Andrew Ladd coming to the ATL for a pick. Go Dudley??

* I haven’t mentioned Volchenkov. I guess I am lazy. Volchenkov to New Jersey. Blah, blah, blah.

* So from the Bizarro World Olie Jokinen goes back to the Calgary Flames. Interesting. Anyone have any thoughts?!

* As an aside, the Bizarro World is a place in DC comic book land where the inhabitants do the opposite. Of course anyone who watched “Seinfeld” is somewhat familiar with this world.

* Ivan Vishnevskiy we hardly knew thee. He goes back to Chicago in the Andrew Ladd deal. Weird.

* The dismantling of the Blackhawks begins. The Blackhawks do stock up in so doing. Goddess Savvy foresaw this in a wonderful post just days after the big victory.

* I am a bit sad that Thrashers pretty much ended up with nada for Kari Lehtonen, a former first-round draft choice, going second overall (after Rick Nash!!!).

* Two-year deal for Chris Mason from Atlanta Thrashers. I am not as excited about this as I might have been about Dan Ellis, though, it might turn out better? Thoughts anyone?

* If Olie Jokinen can go back to Calgary, how ’bout the Thrashers bring back Marc Savard! (Just kidding, Goddess Savvy.)

* @benthrashers tweets: “Chris Mason was 13th in the NHL in wins and GAA and finished all 61 games he started.” NICE!

* @craigcustance reports Johan Hedberg is likely headed to New Jersey. I feel a bit sad, despite the post above.

* If you made it this far in the post, thank you for reading. How about giving me a shout out? Leave a comment and say, “I read this post and I didn’t even get a stinking T-shirt.”

* Hey! The Sabres are going to sign brave, brave Jordan Leopold. And there was much rejoicing. (Later, they will eat Sir Robin’s minstrels.)

* Curious about Garnet Exelby — a former Thrasher and huge fan favorite in Atlanta. Also wondering about Manny Legace and Jose Theodore.

* We need some more bloggers — are you reading this? Interested? Message Goddess Kaatiya.

* If “frenzy” didn’t start with an “F” would it always be a “frenzy” on free agent day?

* Now that the Thrashers have raided the Blackhawks’ closet, when are they going to nab John Torchetti?!?

* It’s been uncannily quiet on the Kovalchuk front. KHL rumors — no? Any rumors? Only the tired LA one. Let’s hear something on Kovy!

* Selfishly, I want Kovy either back in ATL (not gonna happen, I know) or in the K. That way I can still cheer for him.

* Turco? Nabokov? Theodore? Toskala? What’s up boys?

* As a Thrasher fan I am thrilled that Thrasher killer Antero Niittymaki is OUT OF THE EASTERN CONFERENCE! Yes! (As I mentioned above, the Thrashers have never beaten Niitty.)

* Awww … the Ducks re-signed Saku Koivu. Now I can continue to never see him anymore (alas).

* Saw that people call Dustin Byfuglien “Buff Daddy.” Now this I love. Perfect for ATL, yo.

* A source is reporting that the Los Angeles Kings are now the only suitors left for Kovalchuk, New Jersey Devils are out — he’s too rich for their blood. I still have an inkling that the KHL could be calling. But maybe Kovalchuk’s wife wants to renew (?), rejuvenate (?), or in the eyes of some start a career in L.A. Hmmm…

* Where might a personal favorite of mine — Darcy Tucker — go?

* Gotta give props to @TSNBobMcKenzie — that dude’s got sources and sources and more sources.

* Well, that about wraps this up for me. What are you thoughts on the NHL’s free agent day? Share ‘em with us!

I spent most of the day Saturday watching the second round of the draft and stressing over the Marc Savard trade rumors. Then I received this Tweet from the Bruins:

GM Peter Chiarelli just announced that the Bruins have acquired unsigned draft choice David Warsofsky in exchange for Vladimir Sobotka.

And I cried.

I cried over the Bruins losing Vladimir Sobotka, a little guy with a huge heart, a guy who hits like like a freight train.

The big man in a little man’s body. Or, as he has been dubbed on the Web, the SOB. The Little Ball of Hate. A pest, but not a punk, who plays the game the right way. I always thought of him as a minature bull, charging around, hitting anything bigger than him. Which was pretty much everything.

Used sparingly, moved from role to role (set-up center; checking center; wing), never logging enough ice time, up and down from Providence to Boston, he hung in there and finally got a chance to shine in the first round of the playoffs this year, driving the Sabres mad. Unfortunately, he aggravated a shoulder injury late in the series and was consequently robbed of his effectiveness against Philadelphia, one of myriad (but unreported) Bruins injuries. Sobotka’s ineffectiveness against Philly was ignored in the rush to scream about the Bruins’ collapse, but it was a factor.

And now he’s gone. And the worst part of it, beyond losing a player who was born to wear the Spoked B, is that next to nobody cares. “Garbage in, garbage out,” one message board poster wrote.

How sad. How wrong. How cavalier, not only to disparage a player who laid it on the line every time he stepped on the ice, but to dismiss the feelings of those of us who love him.

Take good care of him, St. Louis. Appreciate him, because he’ll give you everything he’s got. He can’t play any other way.

Photo: Courtesy of swerve/bestlaidplans.org.

Hello!  I am a guest blogger, standing in for Goddess Kaatiya.  And, yes, I am a man.  Strong men can be goddesses too, without fear — except of their goddess wives.  Ha!  So, since her sister is having a baby as I type, I will stand in for Kaat and proudly be Mr. Goddess for tonight.  Here goes nothing  …

*  NHL Entry Draft begins with welcomes as always

* I think I see Goddess Sasha and Mr. Sasha!

* Pierre Mcguire is annoying!  Too bad he knows alot about hockey.

* Was that an audio problem or were they dubbing out obscenities?

* Number one pick for best hair- Taylor Hall!

* Yell really loud Edmonton fans!  They can hear you in LA!

* Gary Bettman is so exciting.  Wake me up when he is finished.

* Healthy snacks on the Edmonton table.  Plenty of fiber in those bananas.  These guys are going to be running to the toilet all night!

* Number one pick for best hockey player- Taylor Hall.

* No surprise with pick No. 2

* Any event in LA requires a shot of the Hollywood sign.

* I like the Florida Panthers approach.  No greetings or BS, just make the pick!

* What is Columbus waiting for?

* Johansen to Columbus.  I saw this guy going to Atlanta on several mock drafts.

* Keith Ballard to Vancouver.  Watch out Luongo, Ballard likes to club his own goaltender after giving up a goal.

* Alyssa Milano- an encyclopedia of hockey knowledge.

* Nino Niederreiter- does Pierre Mcguire have something against Swiss players?  “He may from Switzerland, but he does not have holes in him like Swiss cheese.”  Give me a break Pierre!

* Brett Connolly to Tampa Bay.  I could say something about Pierre’s commentary but I won’t.

* Let’s get excited Caniacs, your pick is Jeff Skinner!

* Thrashers are on deck.  Why is Waddell on the phone?  I thought Dudley was calling the shots.

* Alexander Burmistrov to the Thrash.  Hope he is the next Kovalchuk!

* Had to take a break for a couple of hours to entertain Annabelle.

* Hey, a cool Minnesota Wild jersey!  Never thought I’s say that.

* Dylan McIlrath- The Undertaker.  That is a great nickname.

* Mark Messier is annoying as well.  I know he is a legend, but he rubs me the wrong way.

* Joe Nieuwendyk- It is a crime he did not get selected for the Hockey Hall of Fame.

* The Dallas Stars pick a goaltender with their first pick.  Can’t trust that Kari Lehtonen will stay healthy.

* It looks like Scott Niedermayer just rolled out of bed, put on his suit and did not bother to brush his hair.

* Cam Fowler- American with a dad from Canada.  Is it just me or are there alot of Cams from Canada?

* Don’t have much to say about the Coyotes or the Blues.

* Being a geek myself, I know one when I see one.  Those Kings fans reacting to the trade with Florida are mega-geeks!

* I’ll try to be more positive with my comments.

* Bryan Murray makes me nervous.  Shifty eyes.

* Vladimir Tarasenko – great pick by St. Louis.

* I bet Goddess Sasha wanted Tarasenko in an Avs uniform.

* Joey Hishon – don’t know anything about him.  TSN rank is 46th.  Reach?

* Can Sidney Crosby just go away for the off-season?

* Why is Sidney Crosby there?  He can’t even go up to the stage to welcome the new kid!

* I’m trying to be more positive.

* Tinordi — great pick by Montreal, I guess.

* Kevin Hayes is going to kiss everyone in the arena.

* Can’t wait until next season starts!  Thrashers are taking the cup!

So here we go again with another Goddess pick off.   This time, we are selecting who we believe will win the major categories at the NHL Awards today.   As always, we made our selections without seeing one another’s answers or consulting anyone else.  Let’s see which goddess gets the bragging rights for this pick off round.   For the record, Goddesses Annalisk, Kaat and Savvy tied for the win in our last pick off.   After you’ve read our picks, why not give us yours? [Editor's note: Updated with winners 10:35 p.m. ET]

Goddess Face Off

	AMY	KAAT	SASHA	SAVVY
Hart Trophy	Ovechkin	Sedin	Ovechkin	Sedin (I’m sick and tired of Ovechkin and Crosby.)
Vezina Trophy	Miller	Miller	Bryzgalov	Miller
Norris Trophy	Green	Keith	Doughty	Doughty (I don’t have a clue why Mike Green is a finalist –again!. It’s best DEFENSEman.)
Calder Trophy	Myers	Duchene	Duchene	Myers
Lady Byng Trophy	Datsyuk	Datsyuk (Natch!)	Datsyuk	St. Louis
Selke Trophy	Datsyuk	Kesler	Kesler	Staal
Jack Adams Award	Tippett (Did an amazing job amidst all the chaos.)	Tippett (The obvious choice.)	Tippett (Overcame serious obstacles.)	Tippett (Proving that superstars usually aren’t the best coaches.)
Masterton Trophy	Theodore	Theodore	Ortmeyer	Theodore
Pearson Ted Lindsay Award	Ovechkin	Crosby	Crosby	Crosby

Now that you’ve seen our picks, why not give us yours! Leave us a little comment, won’t ya?

Well, they aren’t losers in my book, but “shoulda been winners.”  Making my fearless predictions — who will win the award and who I think should win.

NHL Foundation Player Award
Who should win:  Dustin Brown because didn’t get it last year.
Who will win:  Ryan Miller, since he’s Captain America. :-)

Mark Messier Leadership Award
Who should win:  Ryan Miller, see above and he would so be the captain of the Sabres if he wasn’t a goalie.
Who will win:  Sidney Crosby, because he’s Sidney Crosby.

King Clancy Memorial Trophy
Who should win:  A tie since I love them both for very different reasons
Who will win:  Sidney Crosby, since they don’t usually have a tie and he’s Sidney Crosby.

Frank J. Selke Trophy
Who should win:  Ryan Kesler because I love him. Also, he had a great year and was a big part of the USA silver medal.
Who will win:  Pavel Datsyuk, because people suck and always vote for him.

Jack Adams Award
Who should win:  Dave Tippett who did such an amazing job amidst all the chaos in Phoenix.
Who will win:  Dave Tippett, same reason.

Ted Lindsay Award
Who should win:  Hank Sedin because I love him and he deserves it.
Who will win:  Alexander Ovechkin because no one stays up late enough to watch Vancouver Canucks games and because he’s Ovie.

Bill Masterton Memorial Trophy
Who should win:  All three because they all deserve it.
Who will win:  Jose Theodore just because.

James Norris Memorial Trophy
Who should win:  Duncan Keith. He had a great season and those seven teeth that he gave up against the Sharks should count for something.
Who will win:  Mike Green because some writers are stupid.

Calder Memorial Trophy
Who should win:  Tyler Myers because he is a WHL boy. :)
Who will win:  Tyler Myers, he had a really great season especially as a rookie and a defenseman.

Vezina Trophy
Who should win:  Ryan Miller. Hello? … “Millercles”?
Who will win: Ryan Miller.  It better be Captain America better win or heads will roll.

Lady Byng Memorial Trophy
Who should win:  Marty St. Louis. He’s cool and cute and it’s about time he gets one.
Who will win:  Datsyuk, for the reason above.

Hart Memorial Trophy
Who should win:  Henrik Sedin for reasons above.
Who will win:  Oh, probably Ovechkin also for reasons above.

It’s not even July 1 yet the frenzy has already started.  June 15 marked the first day teams could begin to buyout contracts, and indeed no time was wasted with Montreal buying out Georges Laraque.  And that’s not the only frenzy.  Teams are either signing or releasing prospects left and right, trying to make some financial decisions before free agency begins.

One thing none of the goddesses banked on was the potential for some big trades prior to free agency.  Yet that’s exactly what has happened.  I mean, who would have thought Jaroslav Halak of all players would be traded?  Being a restricted free agent, Halak was going to get a raise and playing in the salary cap era I guess Montreal figured he wasn’t worth it with Carey Price waiting in the wings.  In their defense, they got a highly touted Swedish prospect in Lars Eller, so perhaps it will prove to be a shrewd move.

As usual, the Avalanche have continued to offer one-year deals to no-names and mediocre prospects, so I’ll have to continue to live vicariously through other teams that are making real moves.  I can still pretend they’re going to go after Ilya Kovalchuk on July 1.

Speaking of Russians, there has been little news on other UFAs such as Slava Kozlov and Maxim Afinogenov.  Kozlov is rumored to have a KHL deal in the works, while Afinogenov has been mysteriously quiet, apparently refusing the one-year deal the Atlanta Thrashers offered him.  Of course, we have to remember they’re all still under contract and won’t be available until free agency officially starts.

And let’s not forget the NHL draft is now just a week away.  Not only are we looking forward to our teams drafting some hot prospects, but many a big trade has been made on draft day and we are hopeful that there will be some additional excitement.

So maybe it’s not July 1, but we goddesses are enjoying the little bit of foreplay before the main event.

Photo: Jaroslav Halak by Goddess Kaatiya. Copyright 2010. All Rights Reserverd.

Maybe the headline should have read “Hockey Gods, er, Goddesses Lift ‘Hossa Curse’”? Nah! Too easy.

Readers of this blog no doubt know of my great love and admiration for Marian Hossa. I’ve believed for years he didn’t deserve all the crap he’s taken from Pittsburgh Penguins fans who somehow feel he jilted them (get over it, you had him for three months!) and Detroit Red Wings fans who derided him as nothing but a mercenary (maybe that’s true, but it was his right — right?). It’s us Atlanta Thrashers fans who could really make a case for being the jilted ones. The ones he up and left as soon as the gettin’ was good.

But I’ve never thought of him that way. As I talked about in a previous entry, Hossa gave Atlanta many good years — years he never asked for (please recall he signed a long-term deal with the Ottawa Senators and was traded the same day for Dany Heatley — after being denied a no-trade clause). While he was in Atlanta, he became a huge fan favorite and, in my observation, got a heck of a lot more love on many days than did the ultimate Thrasher Ilya Kovalchuk.

So with a tiny bit of sadness, I watched Hossa finally raise the Stanley Cup. I am happy for him. Short of some horrible misdeed, I will always cheer for him. I just wish, as I cheered him, he would still be wearing that glorious (!) Thrasher blue. Cheers Marian!

Photo: Marian Hossa by Getty Images.

Last week, Damian Cox published an article in the Toronto Star discussing the Chicago Blackhawks’ logo suggesting it was perhaps time to abandon the stereotypical image.  Since I am of Native heritage, Goddess Kaat suggested that perhaps I weigh in on the topic.  We have had numerous conversations about sports teams and the use of Native names and mascots and she thought it was finally time for the Goddesses to address it.

Initially, I was hesitant.  After all, we have much larger issues that are pressing to First Nations peoples, but upon further investigation I was shocked to find that Cox’s article had spawned a racist backlash on numerous message boards.  This is not uncommon when people feel their sports team’s history is being threatened.  Nothing gets people as riled up as their home sports team and its traditions.  Yet the misinformation and racism that was being thrown out on various forums was too disturbing to ignore.

Let’s briefly address the issue that has caused the big uproar.  Cox claims that the Indian head logo is much like the cigar store Indian and that the time has come to stop using ethnic groups as mascots.  He erred on the side of caution – by proposing the removal of the Indian head on the Blackhawks’ jersey.

This is a legitimate debate.  Indians have had their names and likeness appropriated by the dominant culture for years.  Yet whereas some issues seem pretty cut and dry (the nickname “Redskins” or the caricature Cleveland Indian,) the Indian head logo is not.  Some Native tribes actually use this same logo for their own sports teams.  When asked about the logo, Blair Atcheynum, a Native and former member of the Chicago Blackhawks, said it didn’t bother him.  But to other Natives it is still a symbol of the European conquest and hegemony.

To me, the real issue seems to be the fallacies in arguing for keeping the logo and the racism that has reared its ugly head in response to such an article. Such as:

-       “It’s the third most popular jersey in the league!  Thousands of people spend their money on team apparel because they like it.  It’s stupid to get rid of it.”

This is the ever popular “bandwagon fallacy.”  Think 5 billion Chinese people can’t be wrong?  Why not?  Guess what folks, they can.  The thousands of Nazis all thought they were right too.

-       “I don’t see it as insulting. I see it as honoring Native Americans.”

Great.  But this isn’t about you.  It’s about the group that is being represented.  They should be the ones determining what is honoring and what is insulting.

-       “Other teams are named after ethic groups.  What about the fighting Irish?”

Ever hear the term “two wrongs don’t make a right?”

-       “People are too PC anymore.  Indians need to get thicker skins if they’re offended.”

Well, we have pretty thick skins as it is.  We wouldn’t have been able to survive 500 years of conquest if we didn’t.  It’s not being PC. It’s common sense.  I think we can all agree that if a team logo was an Arab man with stereotypical Arab features wearing a Muslim headdress there’d be trouble.

-       “I’m from (such and such) tribe and don’t find it offensive.”

We’re getting closer.  If the people that are being represented are not offended, then perhaps it’s not an issue.  But if some are, then clearly it is.

-       “That’s not offensive.  Offensive would be a dirty Indian huffing glue … even though it would actually be more correct.”

Wow.  Really?  And this was one of the tamer of the racist posts I saw.

Unfortunately, what this post really brought to light was that Native Americans are the one ethnicity that are still allowed to be represented without their consent.  It also revealed that such ugly racism is accepted when it comes to certain ethnic groups.  And while I was initially on the fence about this particular team identity, I am beginning to think that the casual acceptance of such logos only tells people that it’s ok to be not only culturally insensitive but outright racist about that particular group.

Don’t get me wrong.  I am a sports fanatic and can appreciate the tradition behind many teams.  I understand that many people’s identities are largely based on their sports teams.  I’m more than willing to engage in an intelligent conversation about the topic at hand.  I simply think that in today’s society it’s become an all about “me” scenario and what might be disappointing to an individual fan of a sports team, rather than the good of an entire group of people.

Seems a bit petty when put that way, doesn’t it?

Image: Chicago Blackhawks logo from NHL.com.

“Chiarelli needs to move heaven, earth and draft picks in order to get the player he values highest, and – if that means sending a fool’s ransom to Edmonton in order to make it happen – then so be it.

If Hall is the goal-scoring jackpot, then it’s time for Chiarelli to go all in for the good of the Bruins.”

– Joe Haggerty, CSSNE.com

The scene: Several men in business suits sit around a long table in a boardroom. Empty pizza boxes and Chinese take-out cartons litter the room. The low hum of an air conditioner fills the air, its monotonous tones overridden only by the random taps of fingers on laptop keyboards, and the regular clink of a coin on the table.

The characters: Oilers general manager Steve Tambellini, hockey ops president Kevin Lowe, assistant GM Kevin Prendergast, assistant GM Rick Olczyk, director of player development Mike Sillinger, and coach Pat Quinn.

Kevin Prendergast: Heads Hall, tails Seguin. Call it.

Rick Olczyk: Tails.

KP: Heads!

RO: How about best 400 out of 700?

(General Manager Steve Tambellini enters the room.)

ST: Gentlemen! Today’s the day! Today we make our decision!

KP: Finally! These guys are starting to reek!

ST: OK, let’s go over it again, one last time.

(Loud groans)

RO: Not again! We’ve done this a thousand times!

ST: And we’ll do it once more. Let’s hear it.

RO: Taylor Hall, Tyler Seguin. Both 6-1, 185. Seguin: 48 goals, 58 assists; Hall: 40 goals, 66 assists. Both can play all three forward positions. “I think they’re so close, they could be flip-flopped.” – E.J. McGuire.

ST: So you’re saying there’s no difference between them.

KP: We’ve been saying that for WEEKS!

ST: Duly noted. So who do we choose?

Pat Quinn: Seguin.

Kevin Lowe: Seguin.

Mike Sillinger: Hall.

KP: Hall.

RO: Hall.

ST: I vote Seguin. (sighs) Well, gentlemen, we’re stuck again. Put that loonie away, Prendergast! We’ll have to solve this the hockey way.

(Olyczyk and Quinn eargerly start to pull their suit jackets off.)

ST: What are you doing?

RO: You said the hockey way! Time to throw down!

ST: No, no, no! With logic and reasoning!

RO: (mutters) Since when is that the hockey way?

ST: Somebody convince me that Hall is the better pick.

MS: The fans want Hall.

ST: OK, you’ve convinced me. We’re taking Seguin. Thank you, gentlemen!

(Tambellini’s cell phone rings.)

ST: Hello? Oh, hi Peter! What can I do for you? (covers phone) It’s Chiarelli!

(The room falls silent.)

ST: What’s that noise, Peter? What? Your office is surrounded by a mob of angry fans demanding Hall? Did you lock the door? They’re breaking it down? Send Neely out there! Isn’t that why you hired him?

(Tambellini pauses, listens.)

ST: You’ll give us ANYTHING to switch draft spots? Well, sure, Peter, hold on a minute, OK? (covers phone) It’s Christmas! Who do we want?

KL: Bergeron! Oooh, ask for Bergeron!

KP: No, Krejci! Hell, I’ve give anything to have that kid at center.

MS: Rask! (the others stare) Hey, he said anything!

RO: He’s got a crapload of draft picks and prospects, remember. Ask him for Toronto’s second this year, Toronto’s first next year, Caron, and Krejci.

PQ: The picks, yes. But not Krejci. Ask for Lucic.

(The room falls silent. All stare at Quinn.)

ST: Lucic? Peter will never give up Lucic. He’s a monster. He’s only 22. And the fans love him.

PQ: No they don’t. (looks at laptop) Check out the Internet posts: “Lucic’s gone soft! Get rid of him! He SUX!”

RO: He was playing hurt! Are they insane?

PQ: I take it that’s a rhetorical question. Ask him, Steve.

(Eyes gleam around the room. Heads nod. Hands rub together. Tambellini uncovers the phone.)

ST: OK, Peter. Peter? Get under your desk if you have to! Peter, we’ll let you have Hall, sure. For Toronto’s second this year, Toronto’s first next year, Jordan Caron and Milan Lucic. Yeah, I’ll hold. (covers phone)

KL: I can’t believe he’s doing this. Has he lost his mind? All he has to do is pick second and he’s got a great player! No pressure at all!

ST: You’d lose your mind too, dealing with those nutcase fans and media. (uncovers phone). Yes, Peter! You say OK? Sounds good! You can fax the paperwork anytime. See you in L.A.!

(Whoops and shouts, high-fives and general hilarity. Fade out.)

Oh Chris! Yes, I mean the Chris of the Philadelphia Flyers: Pronger. I have to hand it to him for bringing the controversy to the Stanley Cup Finals. I love that in losing efforts he raced over to snap up the “winning” (er, losing?) puck after both games in Chicago, then claimed he threw them in the trash can “where they belong.” Total asshole thing to do? Maybe. But it’s also a dash of genius in a weird, twisted Dr. Evil kind of way.

Pronger has always known how to poke and prod and push his way onto the “hate” lists of opposing players on the ice. Now, here he goes doing the same thing skating off the ice — and I love it.

I am a firm believer that pretty much any press is good press. If this gets people talking about the NHL — great! If it fired up the Flyers for Game 3 (which they did win in overtime) — also great! If it got under the skin of the Blackhawks and caused them to lose focus — way to go Chris. The mind of an NHL agitator works in mysterious ways.

NHL players say Pronger is one of those guys you loathe — unless he’s on your team. Now he’s making off with pucks and infuriating certain members of the Blackhawks (hello Ben Eager!), going so far as to remark to the media (in regard to Eager’s eager interest in his puck-snatching ways) that “apparently, it got him upset. So I guess it worked, didn’t it? It’s too bad. I guess little things amuse little minds.”

Oh Chris! You are truly evil! With such a remark, you zing not just Eager, but all of us who find your unique brand of gamesmanship so amusing.

(No word yet on who grabbed the Game 3 puck.)

So gamesmanship or disgrace? We want to know what YOU think!

Photo: Chris Pronger by The Associated Press.

Hello Colorado Avalanche fans and those interested in stopping the uncontrolled monster that is Kroneke Sports Enterprises.

Yes, that’s right, our buddy Stan Kroenke, who owns not only the Avalanche, Denver Nuggets and the Pepsi Center but also the Colorado Rapids professional soccer team, the majority of the English football team Arsenal and a new ticket agency called TicketHorse, is at it again. This time, he wants to become majority owner of the NFL’s St. Louis Rams.

But there’s a catch. To become a majority owner of an NFL franchise you can’t own another major sports franchise (including an MLB, NBA or NHL team.) Hence, Kroenke would have to sell the Avalanche and the Nuggets if he wants to join the big boys in the NFL game.

If you’ve been following Hockey Goddesses, you’ll know my disdain toward the current Avalanche regime, which I believe comes from the top. There is not a team in the league that is less fan-friendly than the Avalanche. A dismal 3rd from last in ticket sales last year from an organization that previously held the record for most consecutive sellouts (which in itself is questionable, but that’s a whole other post) has revealed this neglect for the fan experience. So, you can imagine the excitement I initially felt. Kroenke gone! A change in the guard! More fan-friendly! Is this too good to be true?

It turns out it just might be.

See, Kronke has tried to get the Rams’ ownership transferred to his wife, who would then become the majority owner, hence allowing him to keep the Avs and Nuggets.

Yep. That’s right. He is pulling out all the dirty tricks in an attempt to continue to expand his evil empire, which means the Avs will slip even lower in priority. We already have seen what happens when you own an NBA team as well as an NHL team. The NHL team will always be the redheaded step-child. With all the big contracts the Nuggets had to fill this past season the Avs were sacrificed, falling well under the league salary cap because, presumably, Kroenke didn’t want to dig too deep in those pockets.

Thankfully, the NFL said “no” to the transfer of the Rams to Kroenke’s dearly beloved, but that doesn’t necessarily preclude other family members from “purchasing” the Avs and Nuggets. So, unfortunately, there’s a very good chance we fans may actually be stuck with the same old Kroenke, the same old philosophy and the same ol’ poor treatment.

Sigh.

But a girl’s allowed to dream, right?

Photo: Stan Kroenke from daily.com.

It’s a Goddess smackdown! Ha ha! Just kidding. But it is that time again. Time for the Hockey Goddesses to make their fearless predictions. Much like we did with our Olympic pick off 1 and 2, read the tea leaves and let you know what we see. We’ll also share our thoughts on some marginally related — but fun — items, like our vote for the “best playoff beard.”

We made our selections before the first game of the Stanley Cup playoffs without consulting one another. So, now that I have kept you in suspense — here are the results! After you read, let us know what you think!

Goddess Face Off

	Stanley Cup Winner	Conn Smythe	Prediction
Amy	Blackhawks	Michael Leighton	Blackhawks in 7
Annalisk	Blackhawks	Antti Niemi	Blackhawks in 6.
Kaat	Blackhawks	Antti Niemi	Blackhawks in 6.
Sasha	Philadelphia	Michael Leighton	Flyers in 7.
Savvy	Blackhawks	Jonathan Toews	Blackhawks in 5.

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Watercooler Chatter

The Goddesses want to give a special award to Scott Hartnell. We appreciate irreverence. We appreciate the desire to make a bold statement, but none of us seems to appreciate Scott Hartnell’s special brand of wolfishness. (We prefer the Peter Forsberg kind of wolf.)

Goddess Amy

• Ugliest player: * I don’t think either team has anyone truly stomach turning in the looks department; but I think that Scott Hartnell has to be the player who best personifies ugly in the way he plays.
• Prettiest player: Blackhawks- Niklas Hjalmarsson You would think being a Swede would give him a head start; but hi!, you’ve met Daniel Tjärnqvist and the Sedin twins right? Patrick Sharp is a very close second as the brunette contender, but I think Nikky is just lovely.
  
  

  The Blackhawks' Niklas Hjalmarsson.

• Disappearing act: I don’t know if there has been one from the Flyers, which is probably one of the reasons they’re in the Finals. On the Hawks though, I have to go with Brian Campbell. He’s being paid a lot of money and, though his regular season was pretty good, in the playoffs his plus/minus is higher than is point total.
• Best shirtless: I’m sure there are more out there, but I was in a time crunch and I remembered this one. Yeah, he’s a douche sometimes, but he helped my Ducks win a Cup and he’s pretty built too. I give you Chris Pronger (pictured, left, with former NHLer Eric Lindros).
  

  Chris Pronger, left, and Eric Lindros

• Best hair: ** It has to be the mullet on Pat Kane. OMG … it’s so bad that it’s fabulous.
• Best playoff beard: Best playoff beard — I hate him but Scott Hartnell has to win. He also comes second to Pat Kane in the best hair department.
• Worst playoff beard: It’s gotta be Danny Briere. It’s just only a tiny bit thicker than Sidney Crosby’s but Sid is 10 years younger.
• Best goalie mask (of those goalies remaining): Cristobal Huet. It’s beautiful with the Native American headdress on it. I do miss Patty Lalime’s mask with his signature Marvin the Martian wearing the headdress though.

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Goddess Kaat

• Ugliest player: * It’s so predictable that I hesitate to select him, but Scott Hartnell, come on down!
• Prettiest player: * Marian Hossa. When he was traded away, it was like they traded away my best friend and I suddenly had to find a new best friend. I am still looking. He’s pretty when he is playing well. He’s Magical Marian and I hope to see that gorgeous play come out to, well, play. I hope he silences the critics.
• Disappearing act: I predict one of the two starting goalies goes AWOL. It would be so easy to cherrybomb on Hossa, who is having a rough go.
• Best shirtless: My selection is the Michael Jordan statue outside the United Center. Someone has placed a Blackhawks jersey and helmet on it and it just ain’t right as we say down South. Jordan deserves to be left in his old Bulls jersey, not dolled up like the famous Manneken Pis in Brussels, Belgium whom they love to dress up in costumes. No, no. MJ deserves the respect of being in his own gear. Therefore, he’s my pick for “best shirtless” — or would be best shirtless. He shouldn’t be in that jersey!
  
  

  A Blackhawks jersey was placed on the Michael Jordan statue outside of the United Center.

• Best hair: ** I am kind of loving Marian’s shag. He’s got a nice looking Beatles vibe going and I dig it. Enough of the spiky. He’s going all sleek and silky. Nice! (His beard looks well looked after too. Extra points!)
  

  Marian Hossa's new 'do.

• Best playoff beard: Yeesh, that’s a tough one. I am not much of a beard fan in general, but I rather like the beards that haven’t come in all the way or are patchy — you just know that bothers the poor guys. I find it endearing and, dare I say it? Cute. There, I ruined my rep.
• Worst playoff beard: Chris Pronger. I am baffled by his lack of a beard at all. Come on!
• Best goalie mask (of those goalies remaining): Cristobal Huet. I really like the feathers and the continuity of a theme. It just looks cool. I know some people will think that makes me uncool and that I am stereotyping or being otherwise rude. Not in the least. I just think it looks awesome. Only great love is intended.
  

  Cristobal Huet's beautiful, colorful mask.

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Goddess Sasha

• Ugliest player: *I’m interpreting like I always do. Literally. It is a close race between Scott Hartnall and Ian LaPerriere.
• Prettiest player: * Niklas Hjalmarsson. Just check him out.
• Disappearing act: I will predict that Patrick Kane does the disappearing act .
• Best shirtless: Riley Cote. I’m not sure what is best, but it’s best something.
  

  Riley Cote's sexy chest.

• Best hair: ** Patrick Sharp always has great hair.
  

  Patrick Sharp and his fabulous hair.

• Best playoff beard: Arron Asham – he looks Asian with his..so much so the third search suggestion when you start to type in your google toolbar is “Arron Asham Asian.”
• Worst playoff beard: Simon Gagne — Because it’s just ugh.
  
  

  Simon Gagne, left, and Danny Briere were both tagged as having the worst playoff beard.

• Best goalie mask (of those goalies remaining):Both are very un-inspiring I think.
• Thoughts: I think Philadelphia will win — a bunch of no names, barely squeaking in and have scratched and clawed their way to the finals.

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Goddess Savvy

• Ugliest player: * Hmmm… Carcillo or Hartnell… Carcillo or Hartnell… oh great. Now I have to go wash my brain out with soap.
• Prettiest player: * Patrick Kane. I like pretty boys with curly blond mullets. Reminds me of my college days.
  
  

  Patrick Kane wears hockey hair nouveau (and a fauxhawk?).

• Disappearing act: Chris Pronger. Wishful thinking, I know. But I’m hoping somebody does this to him:

• Best shirtless: [Editor's note: Goddess Savvy is cheating again! Ha ha! -- Admin] The Boston Bruins aren’t in the final. :-( He’s pretty anyway: Matt Hunwick.
  

  He's not in the finals, but he still looks good with his shirt off: Matt Hunwick.

• Best hair: ** Kane, of course.
• Best playoff beard: Danny Briere, because it’s so… sad. Like a little lost playoff beard.
• Worst playoff beard: Jonathan Toews, hands down. He looks like he’s molting.
• Best goalie mask (of those goalies remaining): Tuukka Rask. He’s not remaining? He SHOULD be!
• Thoughts? Blackhawks in five. (I wonder if Stan Bowman, the Blackhawks GM, will cap off the series win by hoisting the Stanley Cup and saying, “Après moi, le deluge”?)

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* Note 1: Prettiest/ugliest player was open to interpretation. It could have meant looks, style or play, however the goddess chose to interpret that question.
* Note 2: There is not a “worst hair” category as it is clear that Scott Hartnell would sweep it.

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Photos: Patrick Kane by Getty Images; Matt Hunwick by Stuff Boston; Marian Hossa by The Associated Press; Michael Jordan statue by The Associated Press; Niklas Hjalmarsson from NHL.com; Chris Pronger and Eric Lindros from deadspin.com; Riley Cote from fllyers07-08.blogspot.com; Patrick Sharp by NHL.com.

I try to be kind in my posts. I really do. But I can’t hold back on commenting on the insane decision both Adam Foote and the Colorado Avalanche made. Yesterday, the Avs signed Footer to a one year, $1 million deal.

Nothing too personal Adam, but it’s time to retire. The Avalanche have a plethora over overpaid defenseman and given that this was probably the weakest part of their game this year (oh the ugliness had we not had Anderson in net) it seems like starting fresh might be the way to go — especially with the number of young defensemen in the system.

That extra $500,000 or so would look awful tasty on a talented, skating free agent this summer. Yes, the Avs have plenty of cap room, but to land a couple of high-scoring forwards that extra might just come in handy.

Foote has definitely lost a step the past couple of seasons and his decision making has been questionable. As I said — nothing personal. We sat next to his wife and kids all last season and they were quite nice. I’m just surprised given his declining performance (and his wife’s apparent boredom as she could be seen texting on her BlackBerry throughout the games) that he’d sign for another year.

A friend suggested that perhaps the signing was more about a roof over Matt Duchene’s head (he lived at the Foote residence all last year) and keeping a close eye on the young starling. Given the nature of this signing, it’s as good an explanation as any.

Photo:  Adam Foote by Goddess Sasha. Copyright 2009. All Rights Reserved.

My dear Marian (Hossa, of course!) has once again made it to the Stanley Cup Finals. That’s three years in a row, with three different teams — and that’s a pretty incredible feat. As someone who was lucky enough to get to watch Marian for many years in Atlanta, I know how good he can be. It’s time for him to step it up in the playoffs and get over the yips or whatever it is that has him underperforming. He’s better than his playoff stats show. He’s magical when he’s on. It’s time for him to bring out the magic stick and show everyone what I think we all know he’s capable of. I can’t help but think that, although the Blackhawks got this far in the playoffs without — for the most part — his otherworldly skills, Marian has to be more than a mere mortal before the hockey gods (and goddesses!) will allow him to lift the Cup. He just seems to have a curse on him.

I find it rather intriguing that Hossa, who was signed by, and traded from, the Ottawa Senators (to the Atlanta Thrashers) before the ink was even dry on the contract, was going up against the guy — Dany Heatley now of the San Jose Sharks — he was traded for way back when. For all of the gaffes Marian has made in the media over the last several years and for all the things he’s said that have pissed people off, I think he’s been nothing if not honest and hard working. I will sound like a bitter Thrashers fan but I think the exact opposite of “the Heater.”

I’ve always understood Heatley’s desire to depart from Atlanta and try to cobble his mind back together without the daily, sorrowful reminders the city held for him. But he’s shown himself to be kind of a louse. Quitting, not just on the city of Atlanta and the fans who stood so firmly behind him, but on the Swiss team he signed with during the NHL lockout (to head to Russia to play for Ak Bars Kazan, a team loaded with NHL talent), then on the Senators last year, demanding a trade after signing a big old contract, which, of course, contained the dreaded no-trade clause. I’m not going to go so far as to compare him — either jokingly or seriously — to Stalin as one somewhat amusing columnist did back during last summer’s “Dany-gate.” But maybe the hockey gods have spoken after all. Hossa’s in, Heater’s out.

Or maybe I am just being ridiculous. Maybe it’s just the way Lady Luck danced … the cookie crumbled … the puck bounced. Whatever it is, I have always admired Marian Hossa as a person and a player. As a Thrasher fan, it sucks he’s gone and it hurts to know he didn’t want to be in my city on my team, but he didn’t choose Atlanta and I respect his decision to seek his fame and fortune elsewhere. In short, I wish him well and hope that, the third time is, indeed, a charm. There is a Russian proverb that asserts “God loves the number three.” Maybe this is Hossa’s year after all.

Photos: Thrasher fan by Goddess Kaatiya. Copyright 2007-2010. All Rights Reserved. Marian Hossa by Chris Stanford, chrisstanford.com.

I know I should be talking about something Avs related, like where Paul Stastny went during the first (and only) round of the Avs playoffs this year, but something more intriguing has me itching to blog.

For those who missed the big (snicker) news, some Canadian blogger named Gordon McIntyre lashed out at Darren Pang for calling twin hockey stars Daniel and Henrik Sedin “The Twinkies.”  McIntyre claimed that the term “twinkies” somehow questioned their playing abilities, their characters and their status as real men.

The debate has been raging ever since.  Did Panger really mean to use the term “twinkies” as a humorous nod to their, in fact, being twin brothers? (In my day, “twinkie” was very often used to describe, for example, two people who wore the same shirt to a party: “Oh look! We’re twinkies!”) Or was it something more sinister?  Most people laughed, with the majority of readers believing he really did mean nothing more serious than that, yes, they are twins.

Does anyone else see something wrong with this picture?

Let’s assume for a moment, that Darren Pang really did mean to refer to the twins as “twinkies” a term often used by the gay community.  Is this a bad thing?  Despite what McIntyre was able to dredge up from the oh-so-credible source, Urban Dictionary, the term “twinkie” is not necessarily, or even usually, meant to be derogatory.  Its origins in the gay community refer to a certain type of man -– one that is pale, slender and good-looking with boyish features.

So, let’s continue down this road and say that Darren Pang really was using this particualr definition of “twinkie” to describe The Twins.  Does that put him in the wrong?  Does that mean, as McIntyre suggests, that the slender, boyish, handsome men dubbed “twinkies” do not possess “character and altruism?”  Or, that they aren’t capable of such feats as winning the Art Ross trophy or playing all but ten games in the last nine seasons as the Sedin brothers have?   Or, even worse, that these men are “sissies” simply because they might be gay? Or at the very least, possess a certain look that the gay community finds attractive?  Is our friend Gord so homophobic that he can’t stomach the fact that an NHL player might be attractive to other men? Or God forbid, even –- dare I say it Gord –- be *gasp* gay?

Well, Gord, I have some news for you.  Studies indicate that 1 in 10 people in this world are estimated to be homosexual (and that estimate is now, generally, seen as low.)  That means statistically, there are at least 30 (and probably closer to 50-60) gay men in the NHL. In fact, I’ll go out on a limb and suggest that at least a few gay men have won an award, title or Stanley Cup in the past 100 years or so.  Think men tough enough for hockey can’t be boyishly good looking, pretty or even gay?  I would think an educated Canadian like you would know better.

So really, the controversial character shouldn’t be Darren Pang at all. Regardless of what he meant, he said nothing wrong.  Rather, the odd, seemingly homophobic implications of one McIntyre should be what is in question.

Let us know what you think.

Photos: Daniel and Henrik Sedin by Goddess Kaatiya. Copyright 2007-2010. All Rights Reserved. Darren Pang from his official Twitter page.